The Toilet Seat Art Museum in San Antonio is the life’s work of 95-year-old retired plumber Barney Smith. He started decorating discarded toilet seat lids 50 years ago and now he has 1,230 of them in his collection. They’re on display in a detached garage just a few paces behind his suburban home.

With seat covers as his canvas, his art is best described as found object assemblage. The breadth of Barney’s interests is astonishing: He has seats devoted to cosmetology, ophthalmology, gastroenterology, soccer, ties, pipes, pocket watches, therapy animals, The Wizard of Oz, Scrabble, Obama, Iraq, Nascar, the Taco Bell Chihuahua, petrified wood, faucet handles, clowns, archery, Michael Jackson, Troll Dolls, Pez dispensers, Ford Model Ts, Candid Camera, the Holocaust, and Montel Williams (whose show he appeared on multiple times in the nineties).

Barney uses a bamboo cane to guide visitors through the museum and point out his favorite works—like the seat decorated with what he claims is a million dollars in shredded bills from the Federal Reserve Bank of San Antonio. There’s a seat about Edible Arrangements (yes, like the fruit bouquets) and another about Great Clips, featuring real human hair.

The most sentimental seats are dedicated to anniversaries spent with his beloved wife, Louise, who passed away in 2013. Barney is charming and quick with a joke; you could easily spend an hour with him perusing the collection. He loves posing for pictures with guests and asks every visitor to sign a toilet seat themed to their home state or country. (There are “overflow” seats for states with excess visitors, like Texas and New York.) The museum is free to enter but visitors must call ahead so Barney can get the place in top running order.

239 Abiso Ave., San Antonio, TX; 210-824-7791.